Personal Political History

I am a Democrat.

That has technically not always been the case. My first political memories are from back in 1984 when I was 8. I'm a nerdy kid living on the upper east side of Manhattan. Kids make fun of me a lot for being really skinny and for picking my nose in public (okay that is gross). I'm insecure but also somewhat defiant. I bring on the name calling as as I can by purposefully being contrary. When kids make fun of me for not knowing who Michael Jackson is I claim I'm too busy listening to Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton (in NYC 1984 this was equivalent of social suicide). I am proud to say this same logic saved me from ever listening to New Kids on the Block. It is however the same 8 year old logic that made me a vocal supporter of Ronald Reagan. I obviously donot understand politics at age 8, but I wanted to say I liked what no one else around me said they liked (upper east side Manhattan/1984 was a predominately liberal town).

I don’t remember any of my arguments because I’m sure I didn't really have any but I do remember sticking to my guns about it. My parents (well father imposes on mother) are republican so I’m sure that was part of it as well. There was definitely trash talk in my house about Mondale and the “woman vice president”.

I don’t remember if my dad voted but my mother took me with her to Hunter College to vote. They let me go in the booth with her and she let me pick. I voted Reagan. Regardless of the fact that I don’t agree with that vote today, I love my mother for creating that memory for me.

In 1992 (Clinton vs. Bush) I was 16. I honestly don’t remember if I associated myself as a republican or democrat. There is a chance that I could be potentially blocking traumatic memories of being a Bush supporter...perhaps...yesh, I was misguided. I do remember thinking that it was important that people vote. Granted I had ulterior motives (college application extracurricular activity), but I spent many hours by myself around Grand Central station with forms and pens getting people to register to vote. I approached anyone and everyone. I passionately implored them to fill out the form. After much persistence with one gentleman, it was explained to me that ex convicts couldn’t vote...that seemed wrong to me. Still does.

In 1996 (Clinton vs. Dole) I was 20 and away at college…I was wrapped up in college life in an engineering school that did not have a political edge to it. I barely remember that election. I know I associated myself to Clinton at this time but really was a typical college student and disconnected from the entire process. It was the first time I could vote and I didn’t. I know...I was a hypocrite. I was 20.

I have to admit that in 2000 (Al Gore vs. George W) I liked Al Gore but I also was into the idea of Nader.....I lived in DC so I was surrounded by talk of politics. It faned the fire that was created in my youth and has turned into a something that I’m sure others would describe as a passion of mine .....I was also 24 and I moved every year (not just changing apartments, but actually moving from state to state from NY to MD to DC). I never even changed my New York license let alone registered to vote. I remember I pretended like I voted that day because I was really embarrassed by my in ability to get my shit organized. When George W won I felt guilty. It wasn't the complete devastation I felt in 2004, but it's the exact moment that I also knew the ‘being too busy to participate’ excuse was really lame and that wasn’t going to be me anymore.

9/11/2001 – I was living in Arlington, VA, super close to the Pentagon, and like I’ve said I’m originally from NYC and had a lot of family and friends that worked and were at or near both sites. I lost no one that was in my first degree of separation list, but did lose people that were friends/family of friends/family. I was actually in neither of these places at the time. I was on my way to the airport in Las Vegas after meeting up with my parents for a long weekend. We went into panic mode and pretty much immediately got in the rental car and drove cross country to be home. Everywhere we stopped strangers throughout the country were giving us support. I felt American unity and I felt a rage directed and nothing I understood. As mentioned previously I went to an engineering school and you could literally graduate without having ever taken a history class. I was completely ignorant of the Middle East to say the least. I had no idea of war. I remembered wearing yellow ribbons in the first Iraq war but that is really my only memory of that. I knew that Vietnam and the Korean War were fucked, and WWI and WWII were noble. I say all this because 9/11 shocked me and I was not someone on a soap box that was against going to war in Iraq. I never questioned mainstream media...let’s call this a naive stage in my life.

By 2004 (George W vs. Kerry) I was 3 years into a 4 year road warrior life. I spent a good deal of that time out of the US as an ex-pat in South America and Mexico. I was, by this point, what most people would consider to be a passionate Liberal and very anti George Bush and the war. I was devastated when the democrats lost.

This was actually the first time I ever voted since my mom took me into the booth with her in 1982. This election made me slightly jaded, and I admit to this day I have a chip on my shoulder against people that voted for Bush the second time...by the second time, you should have known better.

I’m trying to get over that and to strengthen my abilities of public debate without expressing the levels of intensity I actually feel. I am aware that it scares a lot of people off the subject completely if any kind of passion is expressed. I refuse to buy into any set of defined rules of etiquette that state you should not talk about politics. It’s bullshit. It’s your job as a citizen and as an adult to talk about it. The country is falling apart because people are glued to mind numbing programming on TV and because people no longer have the skills necessary to debate.

I voted for Obama in the MA primaries although I will support Hilory if she is our candidate. I held out hope for a while that Al Gore would run and I really liked Edwards since 2003. I feel confident that a democrat will win, and I’m not jaded enough to think that things cannot get better. I don’t want to begin to think that I might be wrong. It’s winter in New England and I’m struggling enough to avoid falling prey to seasonal depression.